Hello, Sunshine! I have something I need to confess and something I need to work on. I’m a selfish mom, but not selfish enough. My kids are my everything, but there’s a girl beneath the title of mom and she has needs too. Gisele Bundchen recently confessed that she’s a selfish mom and the sanctimommies attacked her. Why? What did Gisele say that was so offense?
In an interview for The Sunday Times Gisele said, “You know how they say on the plane you have to put the oxygen mask on first and then put it on your child? So I think it is the same, as a mum, to take care of myself.”
Oh no she didn’t.
In case that wasn’t controversial enough she said, “You can feel a bit guilty, but if I put my oxygen mask on first, if I’m feeling fulfilled and present and good about myself, then I’m going to be a much more patient, loving, understanding mother and wife. You have to fill your glass so that everyone can drink from it. That’s how I feel.”
Yikes! Someone take her kids away. NOW!
So is Gisele a selfish mom? I don’t think so. If more moms were honest, we’d all wish we were a little more selfish. Being a mama is draining emotionally, mentally and physically. JD jokes that one day he’s going to come home and find me hiding in the closet rocking myself. I have three kids and there are some days that I need a do over. And I don’t want do overs, I want to live and enjoy every moment I’ve been given.
So what makes me selfish?
Hot Coffee and Meals – My family doesn’t eat cold meals. Why should I? I make adjustments to make sure my coffee is hot everyday and that I get to enjoy five minutes of peace each morning. As soon as one kid wakes up the non-stop mom calling begins, so it’s important that I get at least five minutes of peace each day.
Shower Daily – I have to shower at night, but at least I’m showering daily. I’ve heard from so many moms that they don’t get to shower daily. I couldn’t handle that. Unless I’m camping in the middle of nowhere, this girl is clean.
Wear Real Clothes Every Day – It’s so easy to not put on real clothes daily. If you’re a stay-at-home or work from home mama it can seem like a waste of time and money to dress yourself in real clothes, but it’s worth it. There are days that I’m not going anywhere important but I make sure that I have on real clothes. I love my workout clothes as much as the next girl, but unless I’m headed to, at or leaving the gym, there’s no need for me to be seen in my yoga pants and shirt.
Stick to a Beauty Routine – I have discovered a skin care line that I love. I want to take care of and appreciate the skin I’ve been given. I want my daughters and son to see how important to is take of yourself with simple things like great hygiene. It’s a win-win for everyone.
How Can I be More Selfish?
Workout – I have been so busy lately that I haven’t had time dedicated to seriously workout. I try to sneak in a quick routine when I can, but my body, health and mind need me to workout and take care of myself. And guess what? My kids need me to take care of myself too.
Alone Time – There are few times that I go anywhere by myself. Sure JD has a two-hour commute daily, but it’s alone time to listen to whatever he wants to on the radio. It’s time to unleash his mind and push away any negativity that may try to fill his mind. My mind likes to come alive at 3:00 a.m. when everyone else is sound asleep. A few moments alone to meditate and push away the negativity would be amazing!
Friends – Between work, the kids schedules and trying to take care of everyone else’s needs, I don’t have time to spend with my friends or make new ones. I’m a social creature by nature and seclusion is dangerous to my mental well-being. I don’t like to be lonely.
Give My Kids More Responsibility In Their Lives – They’re capable creatures of doing more than they currently do. Messes drive me crazy! I can’t handle seeing stuff thrown everywhere. Holding them responsible for taking care of our home and meeting their own needs will make them better human beings and remove the stress of me feeling like I need to do everything by myself. I deal with far too many adults who can’t do anything by themselves and are flat-out irresponsible. I refuse to allow my kids to be like that. It’s no way to live or enjoy life.
Instead of wishing for a time out, this mama is going to make sure she puts her needs first. Meeting my needs will make me a better mama, wife, friend and overall human being.
Are you a selfish mom?
What makes you selfish?