Goodbye 2009

By Chastity

Wow, what a year. 2009 had it’s moments of ups and downs.

This past year-and-a-half has been full of struggles. My husband lost his job twice due to the problematic financial industry. We have been living on limited funds and finding creative ways to make money stretch.

But at the same time, I wouldn’t change anything. My beautiful daughter was born this year and she is such a blessing.

If I changed anything it would affect the whole course of my life. I may not have my son or daughter. Both of my children were born during very difficult times in my life. I believe everything happens for a reason.

I know that you have to go through a valley to reach the peak of a mountain. I realized that late one night when all my struggles and worries were keeping me up.

Laying in my bed crying, I was feeling sorry for myself. Why me?

Why not me? Who am I to think that I should never go through anything.

Then I felt a warm comfort and realization. God was with me and I felt safe.

God reminded me that he loves me. He provided for my needs. I did not recognize it, but my needs were met.

My husband had a job during my pregnancy providing the insurance to cover the maternity care. He hated the job, but it provided for our needs at the time.

I believe God told me, I gave you what you needed at that time in your life. It may not be what you wanted, but your needs were met. I provided for your needs, why don’t you trust me with your dreams?

Why is it we don’t trust God with our dreams? Is it because we don’t think we deserve it or we don’t think he cares?

I know God will give you your dreams. In my shallow worries of the daunting day-to-day tasks, I didn’t realize that I had been given my dreams.

I always dreamt of having a son and daughter. God gave me the two most amazing, beautiful children I could ever ask for. They are healthy, happy kids. They bring so much joy into my life.

I have a wonderful husband who loves me. I am much happier loosing my home and being jobless then I will ever be without them. I am thankful everyday for my family.

HE gave me my dream!

I know God will continue to provide for my needs. He is my Jehovah Jireh – my provider.

This new year and new decade I will give God my dreams knowing that he will provide for my needs and bless me with my dreams. There is nothing HE can’t do.

God loves me!

It seems so simple, but it is such an amazing love. Too often, I get carried away with the struggles life presents that I forget about my loving Father.